i havent updated this in forever but ive been going through alot and i feel the need too vent out..
ONE- school, im failing comp for college and the only reason is because my lazyness. i hate writing so i decided never to do my homework.. my parents are flippin about that. also algebra 2 can suck it because even though im not failing its so hard to learn with ms. regetz cause shes rediculous. i love her to death as a teacher but i cannot understand her, actually it might be that i just hate math too.
TWO- college, ive havent gotten any acceptance letters yet so i dont know if i should be worried or relieved.. all i know is that im hoping i get into these 3 schools- montclair, university of central florida, and university of delaware.. then from there i can DIE trying to fiqure out which school i want to go to, i really want to get out of this place, college is about starting all over & i want to do that so bad. no one knows you there.. so i want UCF because its far and its such a new atmosphere also because i only know ONE person thats going there && its my good friend jimmy, i think well have a kick ass time if we both get accepted. i love the campus too, its amazing everyones just open & fun, i really love it. but then again i dont want to leave home, i mean its HOME.. 80% of me wants to leave but that 20% is wanting home so bad and i no i should get out and try new things cause thats what EVERYONE is telling me but its my friends, my life, my everything. thats why i want MSU && it also has a awesome physical education program, and duh thats my major.. anyway, then we have UDEL- im going to see the school in a week with Casey, Steph & Nicole (from devils) were doing some cheering clinic it should be fun.. but i get to visit there and look around and everyone, they have an awesome cheer team i want to get on, but also its like NOT FLORIDA & NOT JERSEY! its in between kinda, like im out but not too far from home. im so confused i dont no what to do.. + meg goes there and shes fam. even though we get on each others nerves its still love, its still family. i dont think i could ever stay mad at that girl. but yeah.. im so lost on the whole choosing bit. but i guess im just gonna have to wait it out.
THREE- so ive been with rich for about a monthish, and we fight but like usually we get over it in a night, that kid is so awesome and would do anything for him and i know he would too, everyone tells me. but i guess i need a break ugh actually idk, cause i met mike and in the little time we met he treated me better than ANY other guy ive been with.. for example- i hate calling guys cause i feel like im bothering them and with him its different HE CALLS ME all the time & he tells me its okay too call.. hes so cute its awesome & we started liking eachother alot lately, but problem is he just broke up with his girlfriend of a year, and he stil has feelings for her, when he told me we couldnt like hookup anymore & such i cried i didnt want to but my emotions took over, i guess because he was so different from any other person, and we still talk on the phone & im the one bein distant, cause i dont want to still be attached and have him go back to her, i tell him im sorry all the time for ruinin this, cause if i never got inbetween and got him to like me this wouldnt of happen, no idea what i should do, it hurts so much. i dont want to give up at all, cause hes awesome. && i stopped talkin to rich because of mike & now if mike gets back with his gf il be alone cause i dont think rich wants to be anything with me.. but jordon says he still likes me. rich doesnt no about mike and i like too keep it that way.. ah i hate boys.
FOUR- cheering, going awesome i love it. our record is weve got 4 1st places, best choreography and most spirit, we lost grand champs by 1 point! ah. but we also had a shakey beginning 3 & 2nd place. but its all good now.. for the next comp. i have to do this tumbling pass that i think sucks cause i cant get the last thing.. but im gonna have to suck it up. which il do, but its rough..
so anyway thats whats been going on, today im going to "talk" with mike hopefully cause we couldnt last night. && then zuz & i are driving up too htown too meet up with rosey & rox, then were all going to the panic! at the disco show & the academy is show, im pumped. thats all for now, il be back.. promise